5 Interesting Inanimate Objects To Follow On Twitter

In the age of social media, whenever a major event occurs, someone will create a Twitter handle based on a mundane thing. We’ve seen it all—Brian Wilson’s beard, someone’s mustache or even a toaster can have the power to magically tweet their mind. With an open format like Twitter, companies, parodies, impostors and, yes, inanimate objects have the opportunity to give their two cents at 140 characters.

KYCouchProbz

When you think of an advocate, the last thing that comes to mind is this: Will somebody think of the couches? Someone did think of the furniture when he or she set up the Twitter account known as @KYCouchProbz, which lampoons the couch that was burned last week after University of Kentucky basketball fans celebrated their March Madness victory over Baylor University. I suppose when you’re in Kentucky, the celebratory gesture there is burning furniture on the street. Anyway, the couch, with more than 1,500 followers as of this writing, feels sorry for “all the couches that didn’t survive this weekend” and asks followers to “Send me your pics of my fallen friends.”

Big Ben

BONG BONG BONG BONG. That, my friends, is the sound of London’s famous Big Ben chiming the time. But if you’re far away from London and desire for the bell to charm you, it has made it in the Twittersphere. Unlike the many inanimate objects on Twitter, it does NOT have a mind of its own. It simply just chimes in. BONG BONG BONG BONG. OK, that means it’s time for the next Twitter account.

Angelina Jolie’s Leg

Even though Angelina Jolie didn’t garner an Academy Award nomination, her right leg should have won something. If the movies of 2011 didn’t get anyone talking about the Oscars, her leg was the talk of social media. The eerie fascination with Angelina’s body parts—with many people taking it to social media to post photos of themselves doing her assertive red carpet pose—prompted someone to give it a life of its own on Twitter. The handle @AngiesRightLeg has over 48,000 followers on Twitter and tries to inject itself into current events, including taking credit for Lindsay Lohan’s SNL performance: “I told her to go out there and break a me.”

The 91 Freeway

For all of you stuck in traffic on the way to work, you feel like every day the freeway is somehow mocking your misery. If you’re in Southern California, this one particular freeway revels in commuter misery as often as it pleases. Ladies and gentlemen, introducing @The91Freeway. This inanimate Twitter handle claims that “it’s always Halloween, but you don’t get any candy” and is “only affiliated with pure unadulterated evil.” Anytime a pileup happens on the freeway, this Twitter account makes misery for its 327 followers (I doubt the vast majority of commuters would follow it anyway). When one asked how an account existed, The 91 Freeway explains, “No, I don’t know how a freeway controls a twitter account and has thoughts. That’s for Science (or Religion, if you’re in OC) to determine.”

NASA Voyager 2

Nearly 35 years after NASA’s Voyager 2 launched to study the outer Solar System and beyond, you would think this space probe wouldn’t learn a few new tricks. But alas, even this product of NASA has a presence on Twitter. If you’re following its unofficial Twitter handle (@NASAVoyager2), you can pinpoint the probe’s current location and unlike the fake inanimate objects on Twitter, it is dead serious in tone. When you ask a question to Voyager 2, it’s tone is reminiscent of HAL in “2001: A Space Odyssey” or any other serious robotic thingamajig that Hollywood creates. It doesn’t have time to joke around or ponder about pop culture; it just states facts and maybe it’s best to keep it that way.

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