Rebecca Black and her ubiquitous music video “Friday” have, it seems, spawned a whole new online genre: music so demon-fucking awful it instantly creates a star out of the performer. Except, I don’t call these people stars, I call them “comets” because stars last, comets are fleeting. The latest comet is this female Kim Kardashian-with-too-much-foundation looking girl named “Gnesa,” (and if you have seen the amount of foundation Kim Kardashian uses [not that I, as a guy, know what foundation is], you know that this girl then, is on the verge of straight-up “pancake face”) who sings a nursery school-level love ditty called “Wilder.”
It is actually worse than that song “Hot Girl Problems” by Double Take, which attempted to fill the tremendous void left in “Friday’s” wake. “Hot Girl Problems” failed to do so, and so too will this video. But in the interim, we must all endure its presence, as media outlets, desperate to fill their 24-hour news cycle, will doubtlessly speculate, via talking heads, whether this is the new “Friday” successor. It isn’t, and it will be forgotten faster than Asereje’s “The Ketchup Song” was forgotten after the “Macarena” frenzy died down. ‘Til this dies out though, give it a listen (just one) and then go back to whatever the hell it is you do when you think no one is watching.
[…] ‘Rebecca Black 2.0?? Gnesa’s ‘Wilder’ is Tired, Viral […]
[…] Rebecca Black has come a long way since being that awkward 11-year-old who busted out with what is widely considered to be “the worst song ever.” In her ode to the second best day of the week, “Friday,” she was a kid, singing a kid song and thinking she was “too cool” for doing it. Now, at 16, she is a young woman who has learned some humility and some boundaries. And it totally works for her. […]
[…] experience. And it never does. But because you and thousands like you have bit the lure, that derivative lunatic can now go buy opium and then commit […]
[…] video for Nicole Westbrook’s “It’s Thanksgiving” starts off pleasantly enough — a fresh-faced tween is singing (and rapping!) an ode to her favorite food holiday as she and her fellow preteen friends get […]
[…] “Going viral” is one of the great mysteries of life. To ask what makes a video go viral is akin to asking “Why do fainting goats faint?” or “Why is Howie Mandelpopular?” There is no answer (none that I’ll accept as “science” anyway), and if there was, everyone would be doing it … going viral, not fainting.I’m starting a new feature here at NewMediaRockstars — every so often, I am going to show you fine readers a trending video that is awesome and/or funny and “going viral,” but then I am going to show you a similar one that is better but didn’t go viral. I’m calling it a “toofer.” […]