Tumblr’s Top Ten Ranking is Bullshit — Here’s Why:

Tumblr, after just five years in the game, has announced their top ten ranking among U.S. websites. If accurate, that puts it ahead of the Huffington Post. “If accurate” is a pretty big conditional clause though.26-year-old CEO David Karp (and to think I used to get annoyed when playmates were younger than me) announced the top ten ranking this morning via a blog post in which he stated that Tumblr’s worldwide audience of 170 million was enough to unlock the achievement ribbon from web traffic ranking service Quantcast (my words, not his). Actually, the real number is closer to 168 million but what’s a couple million amongst friends? If this were the only sleight of hand to be had, this would be a non-issue; however, there are a few other questionable issues of note.For one, the Los Angeles Times raises issue with Quantcast at large, mentioning that the service appears to be using outdated numbers in its rankings, and is thus a dubious source of reliably quantifiable data. This also could be considered a matter of rather small potatoes in the bigger picture, which is that Tumblr, who currently sits at number nine in the top ten ranking, is a blogging site fast on the rise. Sure, but a top ten status is rarefied air, and are memes of Jay Cutler smoking or political GIFs enough to put a site up there amongst the ranks of Google, Wikipedia and Facebook?Well, if its fact-checking is accurate (there’s that conditional clause again), the International Business Times points out that actually Tumblr’s Top Ten designation comes not from Tumblr being in the top ten of all U.S. websites (there, it is actually at number 15! Fucking Bing is ahead of it!), but rather from its place in the top ten of all networking sites. While still a seriously substantial number, this is akin to me saying I’m in the top ten of sexiest men, when really what I mean is that I am in the top ten of sexiest fat men. And believe me, to women, there is a difference. Nice try, Tumblr. Come back when you’re worth a damn.

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