‘Hitman: Absolution’ Facebook App Snuffed Out After Letting Users ‘Kill’ Their Friends

Move over, Venetian sunglasses that Kanye West thought looked cool at one point, there’s a new terrible-idea-turned-actual-product in town.

A new Facebook app, which allowed players to “assassinate” their friends, was axed almost immediately after its release yesterday. The “Hitman: Absolution” Facebook app was a tie-in with the Square Enix video game of the same name. The PS3 and Xbox 360 game puts player in control of the ruthless assassin “Agent 47” who is tasked with murdering any number of drug dealers and mafia dons.

A game that puts players behind the wheel of a contract killer obviously comes with a certain level of controversy. But, as Square Enix put it in a press release regarding the controversial application, “We were wide of the mark with the app.”

The app allowed users to select a Facebook friend and place a hit on them based on a variety of confusing and borderline psychotic variables. Some reasons for digitally executing your friends included “he supports a crap football team” and “her small tits,” because fuck her for choosing to be born that way.

After the hit is placed, your friends will be sent a truly baffling video montage in which, using a profile picture, Agent 47 fires a sniper round through heads.

As far as confusing marketing schemes go, this one is right below throwing acid on people to promote your brand’s new acid and punching babies to raise child safety awareness.

Mercifully, Square Enix promptly pulled the app only hours after its release issuing the following statement:

“Earlier today we launched an app based around Hitman: Absolution that allowed you to place virtual hits on your Facebook friends. Those hits would only be viewable by the recipient and could only be sent to people who were confirmed friends.

We were wide of the mark with the app and following feedback from the community we decided the best thing to do was remove it completely and quickly. This we’ve now done.

We’re sorry for any offence caused by this.”

With the Hitman app off the market, it looks like you’ll have to stick with letting your friends know they’re hated with good ole fashioned passive aggression.

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