Dear Lexi the Dog,
I am sorry that you shameful acts have been shown to the entire YouTube community with that video your owner made. And you didn’t even have a chance to go to the groomers first before your close-up — tough break.
While some will say that you were diving for those chicken bones at the bottom of the trash bin, I know you were actually trying to clean up the place before your owner got home. Very thoughtful of you. Sure you got side tracked ripping up some Klondike bar wrappers, but who can blame you? I’ve often found myself in the same predicament except that I’m digging for the unfinished bottle of wine my friends let go to waste and I don’t (thankfully) become YouTube famous from it.
So chin up, my fluffy companion. You’re doing okay.
From One Scavenger to Another,