600,000 Viewers Tune in To See Woman Attacked By Menacing Wild Turkey [VIDEO]

I love women. They are so easily terrified of hilarious creatures.

Well many of them are anyway — apparently you can’t be too generalized in this fussy-ass world of ours. But this woman is petrified that this bird will, I-don’t-know, peck her knees off or something. I’m not quite sure how she survived into adulthood, but clearly she has never learned the fine art of falling forward and completely crushing the stuffing (ooh, a Thanksgiving joke — how novel) out of this goddamn bird.

YouTube is having a field day over it too — over 600,000 people have tuned in — no doubt finding this woman and her plight amusing, which tells a dark bit about humans and their schadenfreude.

Personally, the mail truck guy at the end (you’ll see) is even more embarrassing. I feel like that guy will one day tell his grandchildren about the time he nearly ran over a large bird with his oversized golf cart the way more awesome grandpas will tell their grandkids about all the awesome shit they did in “the war.”

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