Hero Shark Tries To Get From Brooklyn To The Bronx, Dies Instead While Mocked By Internet

UPDATE 08/07/2013 2:30 p.m: According to the Daily Dot,  people are fucking with Nelson on Twitter. Not cool.


A shark was found dead on a New York subway car earlier today, and the resulting photos were released on Reddit via user GMH517. There is no word as to whether this is some kind of publicity stunt to drum up awareness of Shark Week.


According to the Imgur photo gallery (I’m told those count as official sources now), the shark — codename “Nelson” — was discovered after passengers smelled rotting fish.

The Redditor wrote: “An hour ago I stepped on the train home like any other night. However, unlike most nights, there was a very strange stowaway onboard.”


Metropolitan Transportation Authority officials wrapped up the whole debacle quickly asking passengers to step off the train until all shark-related activities were handled. Unfortunately, Nelson the hero shark did not get the respect he deserved and was forced to pose with a can of Redbull and a cigarette GG Allin-style.


Rest in peace, Nelson, and God help Redbull, Marlboro or Discovery Channel if this turns out to be some kind of PR stunt gone awry. Your life was worth more than that, you brave son of a b*tch.


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