So this Throwback Thursday got brutal. When we hilariously decided that, since the fall season was coming up, we would make our theme “falling” videos, our Editor-in-Chief declared “bonus points if it’s kids filming themselves doing something stupid and hurting themselves.” The idea being, of course, that such kids are not the brightest bulbs in the bunch, and invariably their backyard wrestling/BMX stunt/lighting inappropriate things on fire would go hilariously awry, and fun for the whole family was had.
…it didn’t go that way.
When the hoi polloi pitched “falling” as a theme for this week’s Throwback Thursday, I got this total Vietnam cold sweats/flashback thing going on. (You don’t know, you weren’t there!!!) Falling. The worst part of heights. It instantly brought to mind this video from years ago of an old man bungee jumping on national television. It’s some poor Scandinavian bastard who thinks that bungee jumping on his 80th birthday is a good idea. Instead he has a terrible accident on television (and later, virally, online) and him and his family will forever be haunted by one embarrassing-ass (and I do mean embarrassing-ass) incident.
I will never go bungee jumping. Or at least I will never go bungee jumping after having a bran smoothie and some spicy chili washed down with a basket of prunes. And I have this video to thank for it.
This old guy is probably dead now, but the memory of him will never die for me. And so when someone says falling, you might think going over Niagara Falls in a bucket or someone hitting their nuts while attempting to 50/50 a handrail on a skateboard, but I will only think of this video. And the cold sweats will begin again.
…I can’t believe I let this next one go up. I said, “falling videos of kids hurting themselves doing something stupid,” and Rachel heard, “falling videos of kids.” So, there’s your warning, I guess. –Logan
People love videos about babies, right? That’s what everyone tells me. I assume everything the internet presents to me as truth is 100% accurate and without fault. So I figured I’d contribute to today’s #TBT with my favorite video not only about falling, but also about a baby! Check out this recipe for success! Though, okay, technically this baby probably wouldn’t have fallen if he/she/it/whoevencares wouldn’t have been kicked in the face, but, you know, that’s what happens when you wander into the middle of a breakdancing session. God, baby. Get your shit together.
Also, the baby was fine. –Logan
When you start talking about falls in new media there’s a lot of material to choose from. People are falling all the time. Off of things, over things, and into things. Sometimes it’s not even people, often it’s cats. People love it when cats fall off of things. So naturally I asked myself. How can my “fall” be bigger and better than everyone else’s because I am insecure and love attention. That narrowed the field to one. Felix Baumgartner, the Austrian sky-diver who literally fell to Earth from outer space.
For those not familiar, Felix is an extreme sports superstar who has jumped out of or off just about everything from airplanes to mountain tops. He became a global celebrity after the live broadcast of his most ambitious stunt on YouTube. Baumgartner teamed up with Red Bull to take a specially designed helium balloon to a record height of 127,852 feet, nearly outside of the Earth’s atmosphere. He then jumped, breaking another record as he fell from sub-orbital heights back to Earth, landing in the New Mexico desert without a scratch. The video remains the most viewed on Red Bull’s popular extreme sports channel.
Given the amount of time we all spend watching wild stuff on YouTube, it’s easy to get a bit jaded. We have access to footage of just about anything no matter have bizarre or unprecedented. Still, there’s something remarkable about taking a moment, or one minute and thirty seconds to be precise, to watch a man in a space suit jump off of a balloon in outer space. As falls go, that’s about as good as it gets.
I decided to use today’s Throwback Thursday to do a double throwback — firstly to The Nostalgia Chick’s video from a little over a year ago, and more specifically to the beloved animated Disney films of my childhood. That’s right folks: when confronted with the theme of falling, my mind immediately went to classic Disney characters plummeting to their doom.
Nostalgia Chick’s video covers a myriad of ways to die as a Disney character, so don’t worry, it’s not just a rehash of 10 different scenes of villains falling. While toppling backwards into a dark abyss with no visible bottom is the most cliche of villain deaths (to the point that there is a TV Tropes page dedicated to the topic that is actually called “Disney Villain Death”) it is far from the only way these characters get axed.
So sit back and, in the spirit of the season, enjoy watching all those guys you learned to hate as a child get killed in over 10 different ways.
Have you ever had an intense emotional reaction that left you questioning your goodness as a person? That’s me with clips of people falling off treadmills. Few things make me weep with laughter while also gazing in shock at my own lack of compassion like someone misusing fitness equipment, only to be hurled backwards in a flailing heap against a wall/large object/other person. Seriously, though, please be safe around high-velocity machinery and don’t try any of this at home. Unless you really really want to, while filming yourself, so you can get hilariously-but-not-too-seriously injured and then post it to the internet so I can watch it. Because this shit’s gold. (I don’t mean that. (I might mean it a little.))
Feel like adding a bit of gravity-related schadenfreude to your day? Any epic falls we missed? Dive into the links on the left! (Hahahaha sorry.)