Point Break Trailer Misses The Point

Someone find a Ouija board and summon the ghost of Keanu Reeves’ career, because the unstoppable Hollywood remake machine has finally sunk its claws into Point Break.

It was only a matter of time before someone got the bright idea to put Point Break back on the big screen. After all, it’s a movie that exists and current Hollywood dogma holds that every movie must be remade no matter what, with a younger hotter cast and a dumber script. The original wasn’t exactly high art, but based on the trailer, fans seem convinced that the remake will fall short of even lowered expectations. (There’s also a consensus that they may have missed the mark on that “hotter cast” thing, but we’re not going to weigh in on that.)

The idea of a gang of bank robbing surfers was pretty novel back in the 90’s, but in a post Spring Breakers world where a bikini clad Vanessa Hudgens can knock over a convenience store to finance her vacation, the concept seems more than a little sweaty. Based on the trailer it looks like the new Point Break will throw out the inherent goofiness of the original in favor of icy-blue Mission Impossible style stunts. The lack of self-awareness carries over to the dialogue.

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“I believe that like me, these people are extreme athletes, using their skills to disrupt the international financial markets,” says…someone in the trailer whose job is probably to deliver expositional dialogue. The stunts do indeed look extreme. The two minute trailer manages to pack in base jumping, dirt biking, surfing, and snowboarding. As Keanu would most likely say “…dude.”

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