Dave Ebert, Professional Funnyman, Practically Owns MTV, Definitely Owns Daniel Tosh [INTERVIEW]

Dave Ebert has one of those subtle faces … you feel like you’ve seen him before, but you’re not sure where. He might have been that guy that sat behind you in college, or a random stranger who stood in line behind you at the supermarket, or even that neighbor or yours who says “Mine next, right?” when you’re washing your car. Turns out, he might be all of those things (or none of them), but he is also an increasingly prolific journeyman actor and MTV show host.

Coming up through the world of standup and auditioning for parts in commercials and TV shows, including landing one as the Bud Light Lime-a-rita guy and another as the guy who gets a blowgun to the neck in a Dollar Shave Club commercial, Dave has also made a few appearances on YouTube, notably popping up in this clip, titled “Happy Birthday Brennan.”

But now that he’s earned a regular gig as a correspondent for MTV2’s series Not Exactly News, a show that uses the novel idea of taking videos and news from the internet and lampooning them, we have some burning questions for one of the funniest guys that you have no clue if you’ve ever seen. Well, you’ve seen him now:

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You’re on Not Exactly News, Guy Code and Joking Off. Are you the only answer MTV2 has for anything?

MTV2 is very nice to me. Somehow, they let someone who is less Teen-Idol and more Middle-Aged-Dad sneak onto all of their shows and tell jokes. If you’re funny and confident they give you opportunity and creative freedom. Funny is king. I know this because nothing about my receding hairline says MTV2 demographic and yet there I am, telling jokes. MTV2 takes risks on new talent and as a struggling comedian I can’t appreciate it more.

What’s the funniest joke you ever wrote/said?

I don’t have one. I’m not really precious about my material and I’m not that funny. But I’ll make 10 jokes before a pro comedian makes 1 so though our number of hits are the same, my average is way worse. Just follow me on Twitter. You’ll see.

How did you get started on MTV in the first place?

The production company Back Roads Entertainment was having auditions for a pilot of their new show Joking Off. It was all improvised and I begged to get an audition… and didn’t. My agent at the time said I was too old (a decrepit 26 when this happened) but then they had workshops to try out material and I promised to lie, cheat, and steal to get in. I didn’t have to. I walked in and screwed around for two hours and was added to show. A few months later, independent of Joking Off, I was recommended to audition for Guy Code. I sat in a chair and talked about all the mistakes god made when he designed men’s balls and they put me on the show. A week later Joking Off got picked up. The rest is history.

Your dream date is …

Me, sitting in a nice chair, watching The Wire, eating a lobster, alone.

If a stranger pulled up in a van and offered you candy, what would happen next?

Depends on the day. Probably I’d say no, because interactions with humans make me nervous. But if I was having a good day I’d take it (if it’s not fireballs or black jellybeans or any bullshit like that) and then I’d ask the guy what was going on. He’d be like, “I’m part of a poorly conceived viral marketing campaign from Hershey to give candy out from a van” I’d be like, “Jeez, who thought that was a good idea. Sorry my dude. I bet you guys are getting harassed by the cops a lot and yelled at by moms.” And he’d be like, “Yeah, but they pay fifteen an hour plus meals” and I’d be like, “not bad.” and he’d be like, “I’m an actor.” And now I want to get out of there because I don’t want to know about this guy’s non-van life. And he’s like “My theatre company is doing a modern twist on Shakespeare over at Borfman studios, you know it?” and I say “yes,” but I’m pretty sure there is no Borfman studios, and he gives me a flyer and I wave and walk away, and I throw out the flyer and I eat the candy.

Do you just take the opportunities as they come or is there a long term plan for where you’d like to end up?

Always have a plan, but be open to adapt. I’m operating like a tree, really, I just plan to grow up until someone complains I’m blocking their view of the park and the city cuts me down.

What’s the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you?

I’ve had a thing with famous people I’m supposed to impress where I don’t know to dap or shake hands and I normally fall somewhere in between and just kind of grab their fist. Honestly I’d rather be covered in pig’s blood at my own prom than go through that and I know I will go through it about another 1000 times in my life.

Have the Daily Show, SNL’s Weekend Update, and Daniel Tosh teamed up to sue Not Exactly News yet?

I’m very flattered you think we could possible be a threat to any of those great comedy institutions and also Tosh.

Good guy, right? Yeah, we thought so too. Be sure and support Dave’s efforts by watching his show, following him on Twitter, and above all — praying for him in one of those dusty concrete rooms in an old church. You know, one of those windowless rooms chock full of burning white candles, all different heights. And maybe there’s a bird or two flapping around above, making the candles flicker … real artsy shit — the kind of thing an assassin might do in a John Woo film before he unleashes fury on his former employers who wronged him. Yeah, definitely do that last one.

And share this, wouldja? Dave Ebert deserves your love.